phoebe is an idiot, she is trying to play with shane this morning..like he has a clue why she is bouncing around in his face?

i think somewhere around me there is real beauty in living but today i don't see it because i am coming down with a cold and that freaking jelly just threw a full bowl of food across the floor. i pointed my finger at her and yelled...'you clean that mess up!"
oh yeah like she is going to do that..but i guess i will when i have finished my tea.

i am pretty sure today i am going to totally suck at living.

i don't see any real improvement in black buddy's weight with a week on the steriods. he is brighter, perkier, less arthritically painful..all of which is good. but i think he is a bit thinner too. whatever is metabolically going on inside of him is not good.

shane has come back a little bit in his progressing dementia...at least he is remembering to lay down and rest periodically again. but he is reaching that place where he is existing...not really actively participating so much in actual living. i guess the current bottom line right now for him is...he is ok but not great.

the one who does continue to surprise me tho is zsu zsu. for one who was so utterly wrecked and completely mentally and physically destroyed...she is actually doing pretty good. she has put on a ton of weight, she can actually move without pain and she is not as mentally out to lunch as she has been. she is still totally focused on her canned food bowl but she has actually made the giant leap to connecting the getting of food with me personally and now she is starting to follow and boss me around when i am getting her dinner ready.

it has taken almost a year for me to finally be comfortable with zsu zsu continuing to be living. i don't know how many times i was so close to just calling it quits and putting me out of my misery. zsu zsu while not too upset herself, really used to upset me. and that was the only thing that stopped me..if she wasn't miserable with how she was doing then i could suck it up and leave her be.
i am quite happy that finally both of us are on the same page.....for once both of us are happy with how she is doing. she is one freaking strong ancient cat to come back from the brink like she has. leave it to zsu to be healthier and stronger at 18 then she was at 17...good on her!

chloe has made a giant leap herself..instead of watching me with fear in her eyes, now she just looks at me with contempt. she knows that i know the rules and won't break them so she sneers when she makes eye contact with me..i am just a stupid (but safe) human being...and i should go get her some fresh food.
talk about bossy.
well i better go clean up jelly's freaking mess before everyone arrives. the volunteers like it when i am home in the morning cuz it is not so freaking gross around here when they get in.
and it ain't cuz the dogs are being good and not doing gross shit either, it is cuz someone is here to clean up after them every freaking five minutes.