Professionals

Posted: January 12, 2019 at 9:16 pm

If you get paid to do it, that means you are considered a professional at your job. I pick up poo for a living. I am an excrement inspector. A feces custodian. An ordure concierge! Hahaha! Actually I do do (pun totally intended) a lot of other things too. Most things I do at work are related directly to the animals. I dont do an awful lot outside of animal care. Structural maintenance for example, not my forte. So when the doors on the MP building started growing mold, I asked Carol if I could go buy new ones. She says yes, go down to Rona and get the new doors. So I go to Rona armed with my measurements. The guy says, what way do the doors open, standing from the outside? Fuck me, do you think I could answer? Nope. Its menopause I swear, I cant do complex thinking anymore (yknow, super difficult stuff like what way does the door swing…the door you open 778 times a day, every day). Anyways, regardless of whether they are left or right hand swing, the measurements are not common he says, thats a custom job, super expensive, youd be better off opening the wall bigger to fit a regular sized door. Well shit. Now I am way out of my league. Luckily, SAINTS has a volunteer carpenter, Steven. Steven helps out in the barn most often, but he is looking to help us with odd jobs etc, carpentry type stuff, whenever it comes up. Perfect. Hey Steven, wanna talk about what needs to be done and lets see how we can go about it? Of course he says. So today we meet up and I show him what I am thinking… Cut the header above the door, or trim the door, but the door will be metal and I dont have the tools to cut metal doors, might just be easier to cut the wall above the damn door to make the new one fit, maybe, but I dont really know, what do you think? Steven looks at the doors. Like really looks at them. And he says we should find out why they are wet. I thought it was condensation. Thank fuck Steven is a professional. He knows what he is looking at and how to fix it. It isnt condensation. The frickin roof is leaking. The poor MP building has been pieced together, and where the peaked roof ends and the flat roof of the sundeck begins (the doors right below this joint are the doors in question), the shingles are letting water back up and leak down the walls, into the top of the door frame, and in turn the doors. Steven thinks he can fix the doors. We caught it early enough that the wooden doors arent soft and mushy (other than this one part that fell off the bottom of one, but it can be fixed). He can stop the leaking. He figures we can get a few more years out of these doors, they just need some tlc, then paint to seal them, and of course the shingles fixed so the water stops running right down the wall. All of which he is willing and able to do. So you see, Steven saved the day (or he will save the day, next time he comes out). He will be saving us about $500 (just for the doors) and if I had gone ahead and bought them, the actual problem wouldnt have been found. I would have put a bandaid on it. A very expensive bandaid. Lesson learned. Ask a professional. Every time. Not a professional shit picker upper either. You know what the real bugger of it is? Every fucking thing that I did today, I did with my damn pants on backwards and didn’t notice til I got home. Stupid menopause.

3 Comments on "Professionals"

  • Brenda says

    Volunteers with expertise in specific areas is invaluable for Saints….thank you Steven…(from another poo picker-upper expert.)

  • Laura says

    BIG shout out to Erin…..who can now add professional Blogger to her resume. Just want to say I’m really enjoying all your Saint updates and awesome story telling. Also one positive point about your pants ordeal is it shows how slim you are that you can wear them backwards…..mine would be “what the hell is all this material in the front”

  • shelagh f says

    so glad we have such a wide group of volunteers that can
    step in and save the day. and the cash.
    i can share a pants on backward story too. i went to work
    one morning, the same way and by the time i realized my
    mistake, i just started laughing, shared it with my fellow
    workers, (nurses) and many of the patients heard about it
    too. i am sure it instilled confidence in them about their
    health care professional

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