driving in fear to save her life.

i went over to the mp building to settle them all for bed and poke the diabetics over there. shadow was in a hurry to get out for a pee. we started out on our nightly walk and she fell to the ground in an apparent seizure. i carried her back into the medical room, she recovered quickly but her breathing was not good and she was afraid. i started paging the vets..one of those nights when for whatever reasons no one was answering their page. i finally took her over to langley to the emergency clinic.

shadow was in cardiac failure with massive arrythmias. she was having a hard time breathing. the vet asked me what was our limit financially...knowing we had no money and they had to be paid upfront, i said we did not have dollar limits on their lives, what we had limits on was their quality of life.

so...if shadow had a reasonable chance of pulling out of the failure with emergency treatment tonight and continued cardiac management with on going medication, than we would pay whatever it cost. but we would not put her thru a ton of invasive things like chest tubes, aspirations or whatever with little likelihood of her feeling well again.

the vet figures she had about a 50% chance...the estimate for medical care for her over the next 9-16 hours was about $1400. i paid the half down deposit on my credit card because we brought in $800 of hay that we had to pay for today so there was not enough money in the saints account.

i am hoping that with the excellent care that emergency offers, that shadow will pull out of this crises and be able to come home tomorrow. i felt so bad leaving her there....i remember her terrible sadness and bewilderment when the spca left her here the first night....she liked them! and i know she felt the same way tonight.

i love you shadow...i promised you that soon you could sleep on my bed, and you can do that tomorrow if you make yourself be well again.